Okay, so I started this crazy thing called “60 Days in Robert”. It’s basically where I, just a regular dude, decided to live like I imagined this guy “Robert” would. No idea who Robert really is, just a name I picked. Sounds solid, right? A Robert. Probably wears sensible shoes.
I kicked things off by thinking, “What would Robert do?” First thing that popped into my head: Robert is organized. No way around it. So, Day 1 was all about cleaning up my apartment. I mean, really cleaning. I found dust bunnies older than my last relationship. I even organized my sock drawer. By color. Never done that before.
The “Robert” Routine
- Wake Up Early: No more hitting snooze ten times. Robert’s a 6 AM kind of guy, I figured. So, I started setting my alarm for the ungodly hour of 6. It sucked. For like, a week. Then… I kinda started liking it? Weird.
- Healthy Breakfast: Robert wouldn’t eat a pop-tart and call it a meal. So I started making oatmeal. Oatmeal! With like, fruit and nuts and stuff. I felt… wholesome. It was disturbing.
- Exercise: My version of exercise before this was walking to the fridge. But Robert? He probably jogs. Or at least power-walks. I started with walks around the block. Then, I actually… jogged. My knees complained. Loudly.
- Read a Book: Robert doesn’t spend hours on scrolling social media. I swapped TikTok for actual, physical books. Started with a biography of some dude who invented something important. Felt smarter already.
- Go to bed earlier: I’m used to sleeping late at night, but Robert must go to bed early, set an alarm clock at 10 o’clock to get ready to sleep, and successfully fell asleep within 30 minutes.
The first few days were rough. I kept thinking, “This is dumb, I’m just pretending to be some imaginary guy.” But then, something shifted. I started feeling… better. More focused. Less like a total slob. I actually finished things I started. Like, I read that entire biography! Who am I?
The biggest challenge? Probably the oatmeal. And the jogging. Okay, and waking up early. But the biggest surprise? I actually enjoyed feeling… responsible? Like a grown-up? It was like I’d accidentally stumbled into a better version of myself, all thanks to this made-up “Robert”.
By day 60, I wasn’t even thinking about “being Robert” anymore. I was just… doing things. And those things, the habits I’d picked up, were actually pretty good. I wasn’t going to keep everything up (oatmeal is still a maybe), but the whole experiment? Surprisingly worthwhile. I even bought a pair of sensible shoes. Just in case.
