Well, well, well, look at you, wanna know what football player you are, huh? Like them fellas on the TV, kicking that ball around? This old gal don’t know much about them fancy football players, but I seen a thing or two in my day. Let’s see if we can figure this out, shall we? This here what football player are you quiz, it’s a right hoot, I tell ya!

First off, you gotta ask yourself, are you a show-off? Some of them players, they like to prance around, showin’ off all them fancy moves. Like that Messi fella, they say he’s real good. Messi, they call him. Sounds like a messy job to me, chasin’ that ball all day long. He’s good at dribblin’, they say. Dribblin’ sounds like what babies do. But he’s good at it, I guess. And accurate, too. Like throwin’ a rock at a tin can, I suppose.
Now, this here quiz thing, it’s supposed to tell ya somethin’. They say it’s free, too. Free is always good, right? Ain’t nothin’ better than free. They say this is a free online quiz making tool, whatever that means. Sounds complicated. I just like simple things. Plant my garden, feed my chickens, that kinda thing. But these young folks and their internet, they like these quizzes. Make quizzes and send them viral, they say. Sounds like some kind of sickness.
So, you gotta pick the one that’s most like ya. Like pickin’ the best apple from the tree. Gotta look real close and find the one that shines just right. They say, “Choose the option that best describes you.” Well, I reckon that’s simple enough. Then they gonna “analyze” it. Analyze. Sounds like a fancy word for thinkin’ real hard. They gonna think real hard about your answers and match you up with one of them football players. They got a whole list of ’em, I reckon. A database, they call it. Sounds like one of them government things. Lots of information, all stored away.
Now, why you wanna do this, I don’t rightly know. But it sounds like fun, I suppose. Like a game. And who don’t like a good game every now and then? Keeps the mind young, they say. This whole thing about findin’ out which soccer player you are most like, well, it’s a bit silly, ain’t it? But hey, if it makes you happy, go for it. This Which Soccer Player Are You Most Like? quiz sounds like a real knee-slapper. They say it is a fun way to engage with your passion. Passion! Sounds a bit strong, don’t it? I’m passionate about my apple pie, but that’s about it.
They say it gives you “insights” into which famous soccer player mirrors your style. Insights. Another one of them fancy words. Like lookin’ into a crystal ball, I suppose. And “mirrors your style.” Well, I’ll be. I reckon my style is more like a pair of old, comfortable shoes. Not very flashy, but they get the job done. These football players, they got all kinds of styles, I guess. Fast ones, slow ones, strong ones, ones that fall down a lot. Just like real life, I reckon. Lots of different folks out there.

You know, back in my day, we didn’t have these fancy quizzes. We just played. Kicked a ball around in the field, made up our own games. Didn’t need no computer to tell us who we were. But times change, I suppose. Gotta keep up with the times, or you’ll get left behind like an old shoe.
- You like to run fast?
- You like to kick hard?
- You good at sharing?
- You like to win?
- Do you like attention?
These are the kinda questions you gotta ask yourself. It all comes down to you. What are you good at? What are you not so good at? Just like life. Gotta know your strengths and your weaknesses. This football player quiz ain’t so different, I reckon.
So go on, take this here quiz. See what it tells ya. Might learn somethin’ about yourself. Or maybe you won’t. Either way, it’s just a bit of fun, ain’t it? Don’t take it too seriously. Life’s too short for that. Just like that Messi fella, runnin’ around, chasin’ that ball. He’s probably havin’ fun, even if it does look like a messy job. So you have your fun, too. And maybe, just maybe, you’ll find out which one of them fancy football players you’re most like. Or maybe you won’t. Either way, it’s all good. Just like a warm summer day, enjoy it while it lasts. And don’t forget to weed the garden!