Well, well, well, you wanna know how much to play at Augusta, huh? That fancy golf place where them rich folks go. I heard about it from my grandson, he’s always on that internet thing. He said it’s a real big deal. I tell ya, it ain’t cheap, that’s for sure. Not like going down to the old putt-putt place by the highway.
You see, that Augusta, it’s private. Means you gotta be somebody special to get in. Like them folks who own all them big companies. They got a whole bunch of rules and stuff. My grandson showed me some pictures. Looks mighty green, I gotta say. Lots of trees and flowers. Probably got a whole bunch of people just to keep it lookin’ pretty. They have to cut the grass and water it all the time. I bet they use a lot of water in that place.
Now, if you ain’t one of them fancy folks, you ain’t gettin’ in. Except when they have that big tournament, what’s it called? The Masters, yeah. Then you can go watch, but you still gotta pay. And it ain’t gonna be no small amount. They want to keep the poor people away, it seems. It is not fair, I tell you.
My grandson, he told me you gotta be invited. Like gettin’ a golden ticket or somethin’. And even then, you gotta pay a whole heap of money just to join their club. He said somethin’ about a big fee. Like, thousands of dollars, just to join! And then you gotta pay every year too. Who has that kind of money?
- First, you gotta be invited.
- Then, you pay a big fee to join.
- And then, you still gotta pay every year.
I heard it’s like, $40,000 just to get in the door. Can you believe that? Forty thousand dollars! You could buy a whole house with that kinda money! Or at least a good used car and a whole lotta groceries. And that ain’t all! Then you gotta pay some more money every year, like rent, just to stay a member. He said it was somewhere around $2,000 to $5,000 a year. That is a lot of money, I tell you!
And get this, even if you’re a member, you still gotta pay to play golf! Like, each time! They call it “green fees“. What a fancy name. Those rich people, they have the strangest words to describe things. Like, $525, just for one game. I could feed my whole family for a month on that. And those people waste it on playing with a stick and a small ball.
And I heard if you are not a member, but you are invited by a member, you can play. But it’s still gonna cost ya. I heard it’s somewhere around $350 to $500. You can buy a lot of food with that money. A lot of food. But I guess them rich folks don’t worry about that. They got more money than they know what to do with. I cannot imagine having so much money. I would do a lot of good with that money.
It’s a whole different world over there at that Augusta place. They have rules about everything, you know. My grandson said that they have those guys who carry the golf clubs. They are called caddies. They wear some white clothes and they have to carry the bags for the players. I heard that those players, they don’t even carry their own clubs. I don’t know what to say about that.
So, yeah, that’s what I know about how much to play at Augusta. It is a lot. A whole lot. Too much, if you ask me. But hey, what do I know? I’m just a simple person. I don’t understand those people. I don’t understand how they spend so much money on a game.
If you’re dreamin’ of playin’ there, you better start savin’ your pennies. Or win the lottery. Or make friends with some really, really rich folks. That’s the only way you’re gonna get on that golf course. And even then, it will cost you an arm and a leg. That is crazy, but it is what it is.
Unless you win some kind of lottery to play there. I heard about that. But I bet your chances are really, really low. Like finding a needle in a haystack. A very, very big haystack. Maybe if you are lucky enough to win, you can bring me there and I can watch you play. But please, don’t waste your money on that, son.
