Alright, listen up, y’all. We gonna talk about this NFL stuff, you know, the football. I ain’t no expert, but I watch them games, and I yell at the TV real good. So, I reckon that makes me a super fan, or somethin’ like that.
First off, they got all these teams. Thirty-two of ‘em, they say. Can you believe that? That’s a whole lotta boys runnin’ around in tight pants. Some of ‘em good, some of ‘em… well, not so much. You got your Green Bay Packers, always talkin’ about cheese, and them Dallas Cowboys, with their fancy star. And don’t forget them Pittsburgh Steelers, tough as nails, them fellas.
Now, they play this game, see? They throw the ball, they run the ball. Sometimes they kick it. Mostly, they just slam into each other, like a bunch of angry bulls. I don’t always get all the rules, but I know when somethin’ good happens. Touchdown! That’s when they run into that end thingy, and everybody cheers. That’s what we like to see, right? Touchdowns!
- Touchdowns are good.
- Slammin’ into each other is excitin’.
- Yellin’ at the TV helps the team, I think.
They got these fellas, the quarterbacks. They’re the important ones, I guess. They throw the ball most of the time. Some of ‘em are real famous, like that Tom Brady fella. He’s been around forever, winnin’ all them Super Bowls. Folks say he’s the best, but I dunno. He seems kinda old to me. But he sure can throw that ball.
Speaking of Super Bowls, that’s the big game, the one everybody wants to win. It’s like the county fair, but with more muscles and less pie. They have it once a year, and everybody gets all riled up. Parties, snacks, the whole shebang. It’s a real hootenanny, let me tell ya. And them commercials, they cost a fortune! More money than I’ll ever see in my life, I tell ya.
I hear tell there are some teams that ain’t never won no Super Bowl. Can you imagine that? Poor fellas. Like them Detroit Lions, they been tryin’ forever. And the Cleveland Browns, too. Bless their hearts, they just keep on tryin’. Gotta admire that, I reckon. Someday, maybe someday, they’ll get their turn. You gotta have hope, right?
Then you got all the other players. The big fellas up front, they do the blockin’, I think. And the skinny fellas, they catch the ball. And the fellas that kick it… well, they kick it. It takes all kinds, I guess. They all gotta work together, like a big ol’ family, except they hit each other a lot more than my family ever did. Thank goodness for that.
NFL history, that’s a long story. They been playin’ this game for a long time, way before I was born, even. They used to have leather helmets, can you believe that? No face masks or nothin’. Them fellas were tough, I tell ya. Nowadays, they got all that fancy equipment, protectin’ their heads and such. Still, it’s a dangerous game. They get hurt sometimes, and it makes me sad. But they get right back out there, most of the time. Tough as nails, like I said.
And the coaches, don’t forget them. They’re the ones yellin’ and stompin’ on the sidelines. They got all them fancy plays, and they tell the players what to do. Sometimes it works, sometimes it don’t. That’s just the way it is. But they get paid the big bucks, so they better know what they’re doin’. I could coach, I think. Just tell ‘em to run faster and catch the ball. Simple as that.
So, there you have it. My take on the NFL. I might not know all the fancy terms, or all the rules, but I love watchin’ them games. It’s excitin’, it’s fun, and it gives me somethin’ to yell about on a Sunday afternoon. And that, my friends, is why I’m a super fan. Now, pass me them chips and dip, the game’s about to start.
I heard someone sayin’ somethin’ about a quiz, some kinda test about football? Well, I say, I don’t need no quiz to tell me I’m a fan. I watch the games, I yell at the TV, I even got a lucky hat I wear. That’s all the proof I need.
Now, let’s see…twelve teams haven’t won no Super Bowl? And four haven’t even been there? Well, that’s just a darn shame. But it makes you appreciate them winners even more, I reckon.
Anyway, I’m getting’ tired of all this talkin’. Time to settle in and watch some football. Go… uh… go team! Yeah, that’s right. Go team!
