Well, let me tell you somethin’ about this here Santander fella and them homeruns. That boy, he sure can whack that ball! Reminds me of my grandson, always out there swingin’ at somethin’. This Santander, he plays for that Baltimore team, the Orioles. I seen ’em on the TV a few times. They wear them orange shirts.
Now, I heard some folks talkin’ ’bout somethin’ called “r v l,” but I ain’t too sure what that’s all about. Maybe it’s some new-fangled way of keepin’ score? Back in my day, we just counted the homeruns. One, two, three, and so on. Simple as that. This Santander, he’s got a whole heap of ’em. Heard someone say he hit 36 one year! Lordy, that’s a lot of runnin’ around them bases.
This Santander fella, I heard he’s what they call a “switch-hitter.” Sounds kinda funny, don’t it? Like he’s got two left feet or somethin’. But it means he can hit from both sides of that there plate. Clever, ain’t he? He is a right fielder, play far out there in the grass, he does. He played a lot of games too. I think I heard more than a hundred a year.
- He hits the ball real far.
- He runs fast.
- He catches the ball good.
- He plays for the Orioles.
- That Santander, he’s a good one.
I heard some folks sayin’ that he might not be playin’ for the Orioles no more. They got some other fella, name of O’Neill or somethin’. Baseball is a funny game. Folks always comin’ and goin’. But I sure did enjoy watchin’ that Santander hit them homeruns. They say he got triplets, three babies at one time! His wife, Olivia, must be a strong woman.
Now, you might be wonderin’ why an old lady like me knows so much about this Santander and his homeruns. Well, my grandson, he’s a big baseball fan. He’s always tellin’ me about it. He’s got all them numbers and such. “FanGraphs,” he calls it. I don’t understand half of it, but I like to listen to him talk. He gets so excited, just like when Santander hits one clear outta the park.
They got all sorts of ways to bet on these homeruns now. “Props,” they call ’em. Sounds like somethin’ you’d use to hold up a window. Back in my day, we just bet a nickel or a dime on who’d win the game. Simpler times, I reckon. They got that Santander airport too. But that ain’t got nothin’ to do with baseball, far as I can tell.
There was another baseball fella, name of Henderson, I think. He was good too. People talk about him and Santander, like they were in some kinda contest, seein’ who could hit more homeruns. Boys and their games, I swear. They say Santander is making the most of his “walk year.” That just means his time with the team is almost up.
There are all these other fellas, like Benintendi, Drury, and Will Smith. I don’t know who they are, to be honest. But my grandson, he tells me they are like Santander, they all can hit homeruns, which is what everyone likes to see. They are always comparin’ one player to another. That’s how they do.
I also heard there was a book, “The complete guide to keeping your houseplants alive.” It had nothin’ to do with baseball or homeruns. I don’t know why anyone would put that in a story about Santander. People write about all sorts of things these days. It is like they just put a bunch of words together and hope it makes sense.
Anyways, this Santander fella, he sure can hit them homeruns. He’s fun to watch, even if you don’t know much about baseball. And that’s all this old lady has to say about that. He seems like a nice boy, from what I can see on the TV. I hope he keeps hittin’ them homeruns, no matter what team he’s playin’ for. It’s good to see a young fella doin’ well. And that “r v l” thing, well, maybe I’ll figure that out someday. Or maybe not. It don’t really matter, long as them homeruns keep flyin’!
