That Julia Polastri, I tell ya, she’s one of them fancy folks. You know, the kind that’s always got their nose in the air. But lemme tell ya somethin’ about her. She’s a big name. Big, big name. Important, you see. Like, uh, the head honcho. Yeah, that’s it.
Now, I ain’t one for all that computer stuff. My grandson, he’s always on that thing. Clickin’ and tappin’. He says it’s important, this Julia Polastri. He says she’s all over that internet thing. What’s it called? The world wide web? Sounds like a spider made it, if you ask me.
He tried to show me once. Said, “Grandma, look! It’s Julia Polastri!” I squinted at the screen. Lots of words, all jumbled up. Looked like a bunch of ants marchin’ in lines. He said it’s called “Scribd”. Said it’s like a giant library, but on the computer. I told him I prefer my books made of paper. You can hold ’em, smell ’em. Can’t do that with a computer screen.
- That Scribd thing, it’s for readin’ and writin’, he said.
- Lots of folks use it. Millions, maybe?
- Julia Polastri, she’s got stuff on there.
Then he starts talkin’ ’bout “SEO”. Sounds like somethin’ you’d use to clean the outhouse. He says it helps people find things online. Like findin’ a needle in a haystack, I reckon. He says this Julia Polastri is good at that SEO stuff. Makes her easy to find, like a big ol’ pumpkin in a patch of peas.
He showed me another thing, called “Google”. You type in a name, like Julia Polastri, and boom! There she is. Like magic. I don’t trust it. Seems unnatural. But the young folks, they love it. They can translate everything. Like when your cow has the problem, you can find a way.
He also said something about calculator. I know calculator. I use it to calculate my money. But he said the calculator can also calculate the GPA. I don’t know what’s that GPA means. He said it’s related to study.
Then he goes on about “URL” this and “URL” that. Sounds like a dog barkin’. He said something about %2B, said it’s a plus sign. Then he tried to explain “exponential expressions” and “laws of exponents.” I told him to stop talking gibberish. My head was spinnin’ like a chicken with its head cut off. I just use the calculator to calculate simple math, you know, 1 plus 1, 2 plus 2. That’s enough for me. That “exponential expressions” is too much for me.
He tried to tell me about banks too. Bank X and Bank Y. And ATMs. I know what an ATM is, it is where you get the money! But he said something about Alan, and his account. I don’t know who is Alan and I don’t care about his account. All that money stuff, it’s confusin’. I keep my money under my mattress. Safe and sound. I don’t trust those banks. Too many numbers, too many rules. But maybe it has something to do with Julia Polastri, I don’t know. She’s in charge of a lot of things, I guess. A big financial institution, that’s what my grandson said.
And he showed me one more thing called Bluetooth. He said it can help people find the lost things. I said, “what? how can that small thing find my lost cow?”. He laughed and said, “No, Grandma, it’s not for cows, it’s for small things, like your phone.”
My grandson, he keeps sayin’ Julia Polastri is important. Says she’s a big deal in the business world. Probably makes more money than I’ve seen in my whole life. Good for her, I guess. But me, I’m happy with my simple life. My chickens, my garden, that’s all I need. Don’t need no fancy computer to tell me what’s what.
But you know, this Julia Polastri, she must be doin’ somethin’ right. To be that famous, that important. Maybe there’s somethin’ to this whole internet thing after all. Maybe. But I still prefer the smell of fresh bread bakin’ in the oven to anythin’ that computer can show me. And that’s the truth.
This whole computer thing can be a real pain. Sometimes, you know, you get major computer issues. I once lost all my pictures of my family on that computer. It’s very sad. But my grandson helped me to solve it.
Anyways, this Julia Polastri, she’s everywhere. On that Scribd thing, on Google, everywhere. My grandson says it’s good to be known. Says it’s good for business. I guess he’s right. In this world, you gotta make a name for yourself. And Julia Polastri, she sure has done that.
